1. The fact that she’s left her house is a sure sign that she’s over the loss

2. Who posts inspirational messages about grieving unless they’re “over it”, right?

3. But her status said “happy”. Everybody knows you can’t grieve and be happy at the same time!

4. Dating? Obviously she’s forgotten about her spouse

5. Joy, peace and God in the same post…she’s for sure beyond the pain

6. She’s met someone and made it “Facebook official”…no way she’s still grieving

7. Funny memes? Laughter means no tears. No tears means no grief!

8. She can’t be concerned about her deceased spouse if she’s thinking about her weight/body

9. Nothing says “over it” quite like getting engaged

10. Reflective posts about the “new” her? We have winner…she’s finally done grieving

Certainly you can’t think that someone who has lost a spouse isn’t entitled to leave their house, be happy, begin a fitness regimen or open their hearts to love again! There is NOTHING a widow can post on social media that should make you assume we’re over the tragedy of losing our husbands. Instead of monitoring our posts to gauge our “grief meter”, why not reach out and show compassion, love or a listening ear. Perhaps instead of sticking your nose in our business, you’ll want to direct that attention to your Facebook friend who seems to change his relationship status more than his underwear. No one seems to bat an eye at that but the moment we post a status, the Facebook psychologists come out the wood work to analyze, critique, examine and scrutinize. We’re allowed to grieve while simultaneously living our lives. We’ve earned that right!

Mom to a feisty preschooler, Kerry Phillips became widowed at age 32. She runs an online support group for young widows and widowers venturing back into the world of dating and is a blogger for The Huffington Post.