Welcome to our Blog
Whether you’ve been widowed six months or six years, the grief and pain of losing a spouse or partner never goes away. Join me as I share my own story and those of others from the young and widowed community. Let me know what topics hit close to home, which posts you draw strength from or how you’ve been inspired to keep moving through the overwhelming pain. It’s a place where you’ll always feel connected, knowing there are other young widows and widowers across the globe who understand the many emotions that come with being young and widowed.
How Are You Using the “Widow Card’?
I am a card-carrying member of the same club. You know the one – the club none of us ever wanted to be part of. The club we were dragged into because of cancer, a drunk driver, a workplace accident or even suicide. Club membership comes with gossip,...
Overcoming the “What-Ifs”
There is something unnatural about talking to your husband and then within hours, he’s dead. I became a widow with no warning other than my hubby just wasn’t feeling well. Not feeling well comes with an expectation that the person will get better. Not feeling well...
Get Over It? We Live Grief Everyday!
Today, I am angry. I’m angry because so many in the widowed community are told to “get over” it. To just “move on”…to “stop holding onto the past”. But there is so much that family, friends and society don't see or refuse to see. Our loss didn’t end the day our spouse...
10 Times “This Is Us” Got Widowhood Right
I stared at the television. Mouth open. Rebecca Pearson, played by Mandy Moore, had just described my life. Her words were haunting. It appears the writer for the hit show, “This Is Us”, had somehow peeked inside my world and compared my life – the before and after....
Five Ways to Grieve with Hope
As I watched Oprah Winfrey’s powerful speech during the 75th Golden Globes, the line, “I've interviewed and portrayed people who've withstood some of the ugliest things life can throw at you, but the one quality all of them seem to share is an ability to maintain hope...
When Grief Morphs into Suicidal Thoughts…
Although you knew his cancer was terminal, you thought he’d beat the odds. You thought you’d be the couple that got the miracle. Maybe his death was unexpected. You thought he was coming home for dinner only to get a call that there had been a horrific accident....
Dear Non-Widowed Community
Dear Non-Widowed Community: In almost every aspect of our life, we get to love more than one of something. We get to love multiple children…numerous friends…more than one pet…many different books, foods, places, etc. Doesn’t it stand to reason that we can love more...
The Struggle With Moving Forward
*This blog post originally appeared on the Hope for Widows website. I’ve been told it won’t happen...can’t happen. But it’s already started. I’m forgetting my husband. Don’t get me wrong. Our love will always be something that I cherish for the rest of life. Our...
Five Grief Lessons
At a fair this weekend, a well-intentioned vendor gave my kiddo a package of orange slime. She couldn’t contain herself and demanded we return home so she could play with it the way she’d been instructed: on the kitchen table. What started off as fun at the table soon...
Four Times Your Actions Showed There Was a Wrong Way to Grieve
If you’ve been widowed more than a week, you’ll inevitably hear or see this statement: There is no right or wrong way to grieve. It’s the rallying cry for our community when we feel judged or receive unsolicited advice. How dare someone tell us how to deal with the...
Claim Your Joy Despite Widowhood
As I stood at my husband’s grave looking down at his headstone, I noticed the date of his death. I have survived 68 months. On Day 1, I never imagined Month 1 let alone Year 1. I never thought I would ever get to a place where the pain of his death didn’t leave me...
Why How They Died Doesn’t Matter
“You’re so young. How did he die?” Perhaps I too was like you…curious to make sense of how a life so full of potential ends so unexpectedly. But now that I’ve been widowed for 5+ years, I know the “how” doesn’t matter. Not to me, and not to anyone who has experienced...
Yes, Grief Tags Along to New Relationships
When someone questions a widow for dating or assumes she’s “over” her spouse, it really feels like a stab to the chest. How does one “get over” having their heart shattered or their world flipped inside out. How does one “get over” seeing children hurt for their...
50 Shades of Widow – Sex & Dating Post-Loss
It was 1991 when Salt-n-Pepa’s hit song, “Let’s Talk About Sex” blasted from radios across the country. Sex. It’s often a taboo subject in the widowed community. People think we shouldn’t be dating, let alone having sex. Heck, at times, even we feel guilty for getting...
The Dangers of the Widow Shield
You've been told that you've survived possibly the worst thing that will ever happen to you: the death of a spouse. Despite wanting to give up, you pushed through. You continued to face each day even when you wished for death to take you. The pain was just too much....
Dating While Grieving
I read once that it takes someone with super human qualities to love a woman who is widowed. He needed to have the patience of Job and the strength of Superman to understand that our hearts are big enough to love him and our late spouses at the same time plus deal...
Every Widow Does Not Need a Savior
I often see stories by my fellow widows who meet a great guy post-loss - their ‘Chapter 2’ as they lovingly refer to them. The widow was deep in her grief, didn’t know her up from down and was unsure how to move forward with her life. Then she met him. He understood...
My Dead Husband. My Right to Grieve
Hey, you! The one commenting on the fact that I just posted about my upcoming wedding anniversary despite the fact I lost my spouse two years ago. And, you over there…the person whispering about my tagging my husband in my vacation photo with the kids, even though his...