You weren’t there when I told myself I’d never love again.
You weren’t there when the guilt told me I didn’t deserve to be loved again.
You weren’t there when the longing to be held and touched washed over me.
You weren’t there as I struggled to recapture my past yet make peace with my present.
You weren’t there as I questioned moving forward with a new love.
You weren’t there as I dealt with the anxiety of telling my in-laws I’d met someone new.
You aren’t there as I try to make sense of missing my spouse while simultaneously loving my new person.
But yet you’ve shown to judge.
To question how I could have moved on so quickly…
To pass judgment and make baseless claims about the depth of my love…
To tell me my spouse would be ashamed that I’ve loved again…
To determine what widowhood should look like.
You, with your limited views of love
Who fails to understand the resolve it takes to open your heart to love again
Who has yet to see the beauty in my living after I wanted to die
Who never experienced the magnitude of my loss
Who falls asleep next to your spouse every night…
You don’t have the right to judge me.
Ever.
Simply so beautiful and very much on point. Although I was not there, but in my own space, these words ring loud and true. Thank you for putting them down. Wishing you peace and love.
Thanks, Jim
Absolutely spot on. Thank you!
This is everything I have been feeling. I still have to work up the courage to tell his family I met someone. I know there will be judgment and probably all kinds of unkindness. This gives me strength to know I’m not alone
Remember, you deserve to be happy – whatever happiness looks like to you. They have no right to judge.
Amen to this. I remarried at the 3 year mark and still have people expressing their “displeasure” or “disbelief” at my remarriage.